Review of The Unfakeable Code®
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Side Yatch
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Review of The Unfakeable Code®
[Following is a volunteer review of "The Unfakeable Code®" by Tony Jeton Selimi.]
Somewhere along the way, love got reduced to something you feel—some soft, uncontrollable emotion that floats in when the conditions are right. In The Unfakeable Code®, Tony Jeton Selimi flips that idea inside out. He doesn’t write about love like a feeling. He writes about it like it’s a leader. A commander, even. Not sentimental, not passive, and definitely not optional. I didn’t expect that. I think I assumed this book would lean more into personal growth and mindset techniques, which it does, but the deeper I got into it, the more I saw that what Tony’s really arguing for is a life that’s guided—strategically—by conscious love. Not just in our intimate relationships, but in how we run teams, raise kids, handle conflict, show up in hard conversations. It’s the kind of framing I’ve never really seen in a book that talks so much about leadership.
That connection between emotional maturity and practical leadership is something Tony threads through nearly every chapter. His idea of prudent leadership is shaped not by control or even charisma, but by emotional clarity. And the source of that clarity? Love. Self-love, love for truth, love for impact. He makes the case that when love leads, you become more effective—because you’re not reacting, you’re choosing. There’s a passage where he talks about how real leaders make decisions that align with their core values even when it’s hard, especially when it’s hard. I underlined that one. It stuck with me because I’ve worked under people who could give great speeches but made fear-based decisions the moment things got uncertain. Tony’s version of leadership is less about image and more about internal alignment, and I think there’s something powerful in that.
I liked the clear, repeated reminder that destiny isn’t something handed to us—it’s shaped consciously through choices and actions, which made me feel incredibly empowered. He doesn’t make it sound easy, and maybe that’s part of why it works. There’s no magic formula here. He talks a lot about emotional discipline, about choosing growth when it would be easier to shrink. I remember reading a section where he describes love as an active force that asks us to step into discomfort—not because it’s noble, but because that’s how we evolve. And I found myself nodding, even when the language got intense, because it didn’t feel exaggerated. It felt earned.
Still, there were moments where I wished for a little more softness. I disliked that in some sections, the relentless push for personal responsibility felt a little heavy, especially during moments where compassion for life’s chaos might have been a welcome addition. I don’t mean the book was cold—it wasn’t—but sometimes I found myself wanting Tony to acknowledge how exhausting it can be to constantly self-regulate, to always be the one making the conscious choice. Life gets messy. Not every reader is going to feel like they have the bandwidth to steer their own ship every second of every day. I wonder if some of that intensity could have been balanced with more room to breathe, more acknowledgment of fatigue.
Even so, the heart of the book is generous. It says: you can be more. Not by faking it, or powering through, but by actually aligning with what you already know deep down. That version of you—the one that leads with love, that sees clarity as a tool, not a luxury—is already in there. Tony doesn’t claim to create it. He just helps you peel back the noise. There’s this subtle respect in his tone, like he genuinely believes people are capable of much more than they’ve been taught to expect from themselves.
I closed the book thinking about what it would look like to lead from love in a world that’s still obsessed with urgency and posturing. It’s not a quick fix. It’s not the easiest choice. But it feels like the kind of leadership I’d want to follow. And, more importantly, the kind I’d want to offer. For its honesty, its challenge, and the way it reframed what power can look like, I’m giving The Unfakeable Code® 5 out of 5 stars. It made me think differently, and it made me want to live differently too.
******
The Unfakeable Code®
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon | on iTunes
Somewhere along the way, love got reduced to something you feel—some soft, uncontrollable emotion that floats in when the conditions are right. In The Unfakeable Code®, Tony Jeton Selimi flips that idea inside out. He doesn’t write about love like a feeling. He writes about it like it’s a leader. A commander, even. Not sentimental, not passive, and definitely not optional. I didn’t expect that. I think I assumed this book would lean more into personal growth and mindset techniques, which it does, but the deeper I got into it, the more I saw that what Tony’s really arguing for is a life that’s guided—strategically—by conscious love. Not just in our intimate relationships, but in how we run teams, raise kids, handle conflict, show up in hard conversations. It’s the kind of framing I’ve never really seen in a book that talks so much about leadership.
That connection between emotional maturity and practical leadership is something Tony threads through nearly every chapter. His idea of prudent leadership is shaped not by control or even charisma, but by emotional clarity. And the source of that clarity? Love. Self-love, love for truth, love for impact. He makes the case that when love leads, you become more effective—because you’re not reacting, you’re choosing. There’s a passage where he talks about how real leaders make decisions that align with their core values even when it’s hard, especially when it’s hard. I underlined that one. It stuck with me because I’ve worked under people who could give great speeches but made fear-based decisions the moment things got uncertain. Tony’s version of leadership is less about image and more about internal alignment, and I think there’s something powerful in that.
I liked the clear, repeated reminder that destiny isn’t something handed to us—it’s shaped consciously through choices and actions, which made me feel incredibly empowered. He doesn’t make it sound easy, and maybe that’s part of why it works. There’s no magic formula here. He talks a lot about emotional discipline, about choosing growth when it would be easier to shrink. I remember reading a section where he describes love as an active force that asks us to step into discomfort—not because it’s noble, but because that’s how we evolve. And I found myself nodding, even when the language got intense, because it didn’t feel exaggerated. It felt earned.
Still, there were moments where I wished for a little more softness. I disliked that in some sections, the relentless push for personal responsibility felt a little heavy, especially during moments where compassion for life’s chaos might have been a welcome addition. I don’t mean the book was cold—it wasn’t—but sometimes I found myself wanting Tony to acknowledge how exhausting it can be to constantly self-regulate, to always be the one making the conscious choice. Life gets messy. Not every reader is going to feel like they have the bandwidth to steer their own ship every second of every day. I wonder if some of that intensity could have been balanced with more room to breathe, more acknowledgment of fatigue.
Even so, the heart of the book is generous. It says: you can be more. Not by faking it, or powering through, but by actually aligning with what you already know deep down. That version of you—the one that leads with love, that sees clarity as a tool, not a luxury—is already in there. Tony doesn’t claim to create it. He just helps you peel back the noise. There’s this subtle respect in his tone, like he genuinely believes people are capable of much more than they’ve been taught to expect from themselves.
I closed the book thinking about what it would look like to lead from love in a world that’s still obsessed with urgency and posturing. It’s not a quick fix. It’s not the easiest choice. But it feels like the kind of leadership I’d want to follow. And, more importantly, the kind I’d want to offer. For its honesty, its challenge, and the way it reframed what power can look like, I’m giving The Unfakeable Code® 5 out of 5 stars. It made me think differently, and it made me want to live differently too.
******
The Unfakeable Code®
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon | on iTunes
