OnlineBookClub.org

[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift" by Harold Phifer.]

Hal is in Kabul, Afghanistan, when he gets a call from Mississippi. His Aunt Kathy has passed away, and not only can he get home to attend her funeral, but could he possibly also help give her a eulogy?

Hal returns home to his waiting girlfriend, Deya, and the two of them start trying to find his wayward brothers, Jerry and Tommy. The brothers have been estranged from each other for years, and Hal doesn't know where to find them. Both of them drink and do drugs, so he doesn't know exactly where to look. He finally finds them both and tells them about Aunt Kathy and her funeral. Neither of them can give him an answer as to whether they will attend or not.

My Bully, My Aunt and Her Final Gift by Harold Phifer is a story about Aunt Kathy, who took over the chore of raising the three boys when her sister couldn't because of mental illness. Not having any children of her own, Aunt Kathy was a little outrageous in her personality and how she dressed. She was very strict and abusive and always favored Jerry. Jerry was the oldest and was a charmer. Jerry always got the bikes and clothes and went everywhere with Aunt Kathy. Hal looked up to Jerry and followed him around. So much so that he was soon called "The Mighty Other One."

I enjoyed the story of Aunt Kathy and her wild behavior. She was one of those people who you would notice in church. Dressed to the nines with big hats and jewelry, shoes, and purses in bright colors. She planned her own funeral to be quite spectacular. What I did not like about the book was the way Aunt Kathy mistreated the boys, especially Hal. He was always getting beatings for no special reason other than he wasn't Jerry. This book brings to the forefront how many families in the US are crazy and don't conform to what you would call normal. The children usually survive the abuse and mistreatment, but at what cost? You will have to pick up this book to find out how Aunt Kathy's wacky funeral came about.

The book was well edited, as I only found one error. There is some profanity in the book, but no sex. As a warning, there is child abuse, favoritism, and mistreatment. Of course, back then, in the South, disciplining children was different from what it is today. You were allowed to spank your children, but not beat them.

I am rating this book 3 out of 5 stars because I feel that the book sort of showcases the abuse and brushes it off to the side. I would only recommend this book for adults because of the mistreatment of children.

******
My Bully, My Aunt, & Her Final Gift
View: on Bookshelves

We never really know what goes on in other peoples’ houses, do we? I grew up in the era of public discipline by everyone and I do have mixed feelings about it, though it was effective. This seems to cover some very heavy topics. Thanks!

A very intriguing review! I have seen many crazy families and this looks like one of them. You have presented your views clearly and thanks for your wonderful review!

Aunt Kathy was a real bully to her sister's boys. But she was the nicest looking in church. Someone dear to me, suffered similar abuse when she was adopted by her aunt after her mentally-ill mother hung herself. I shudder thinking about the similar circumstances. Life was very hard during World War 2 when her dad was serving overseas. Situations like this were not uncommon in those days. i hope this book can be therapeutic for those that have suffered the trauma of familial abuse .

This book kind of brings to light the scary things young, vulnerable kids have to endure when someone other than their parents are the primary caregivers. This is also why I cannot agree with the idea of foster parents where the kids have to accept what is being offered as it is better than being left out on the streets. Appreciate your in-depth analysis.

I can't imagine what those boys went through, especially at the hands of their aunt, a person who is supposed to be their family, not even a stranger. I am also not sure how the author managed to just brush off the abuse Aunt Kathy inflicted on Hal and his brothers. Thanks for this well-detailed and carefully thought review. It gives the readers a good heads-up on what to expect.

This seems like a deeply personal and emotional story, particularly in how it explores family dysfunction, favoritism, and childhood trauma. The dynamic between the brothers and their complicated relationship with their aunt sounds compelling, especially with the added layer of humor and spectacle surrounding her funeral. That said, the way the book downplays the abuse would probably make it a frustrating read for me. I prefer stories that fully acknowledge and explore the impact of trauma rather than brushing it aside. So while it seems like an interesting character study, I don’t think I’d pick this one up.