survivor

[evraealtana]

Maybe the fault doesn't lie in the people not asking for help but in their loved one who doesn't give them a safe environment for them to ask for help without fear.

I agree. People are so eager to lift themselves up that they're often willing to do it by tearing others down, even unintentionally, even for those they cherish. "I might have made mistakes, but at least I never did THAT."

I wonder if this tendency is cultural or if it is inherent in human nature.

[Readinggrl18]

It takes accepting who we are, mistakes and all, to truly be happy. We all need help at some time or other in our journey of life. If we are willing to accept help from those who love us, we can move forward and learn to grow and eventually help others. I think that is what life is all about. If we are too scared or prideful, we get stuck. If we are willing to humble ourselves and reach out to others when they need it and accept an outreached hand to us when we need it, we can grow.

[_claudi_]

In a world where asking for help is considered as being a weakling and you can easily get preyed on by the people who you ask help from. Kalayla trying to help Maureen came from a place of love and kind of a way of reciprocating the same love she had gotten from her friend and mother when she needed help too. The prayer is to meet someone who genuinely wants to help when it is needed most.

[Ldpuff]

Sometimes making mistakes is a toxic habit. Like you said, we even do it knowing we are making a mistake sometimes. It is almost like we cannot help ourselves. That is where family and friends come into the scenario to point out our mistakes and help us. Occasionally, all it takes it for someone to voice it out loud. If we know internally we are making mistakes we can live under the falsity that we never acknowledged the mistake. When someone speaks it, it becomes real and less easy for us to hide it.

[zainherb]

Everyone likes to put up a strong front so as not to be called weak and exploited. Also, the fear that the help sought might not be forthcoming and can lead to ridicule is another factor. In the end, asking for help when necessary makes life easier.

Exactly!
And I suppose we'll always be that way as we're humans and have a certain amount of dignity we want to hold on to.
However, there is a difference between putting on a brave front before the world and putting on a front before yourself.

You may act like you need no help in front of those you aren't sure of asking (ehem...raising my hand), but you need to be honest with yourself first and foremost, and just maybe, you might be able to get help from someone sincere without even having to ask for it.

[ElizaBeth Adams]

I agree with what you have said. Oftentimes, the best help and support come from someone who has been down a rough road and has already received help. Her road may be different or similar, but her ability to empathize with your pain is sincere. That sincerity and willingness to come alongside you can make all the difference in the world.

[PeterRabitt20]

Thank you for bringing up that quote. I also like it!

"I learned that if you get help, you can help yourself." That made a lot of sense. Lena is good at acknowledging that she can't do everything herself. Probably because of her age, but also because she learned from her marriage. I think that it is another good underlying message that is in the story. I know many people who refuse to get help for their problems, only to regret it.

[Raluca_Mihaila]

Everyone makes mistakes! It is hard, but we should acknowledge and accept them, forgive ourselves and move on. Or ask for help, if we cannot do this. That's the healthiest attitude of a survivor.

[Vivian Jabeya]

At times we are unable to stop others from making a mistake because we think that they know what they are doing. Other times, we feel that it is better that they learn from their mistakes.

[car-mbz]

Asking for help is not easy. There is always the fear of being judged when you reveal your problem. Also people fear they may be rejected when they ask for help.

[Priyankaaa18]

Survival takes bravery, and Lena was brave. She needed help as her battle got harder. She couldn't fight alone, but who did she had? Lena's mother told her to accept her life the way it way. That she couldn't let others see her as who she really was. Most people didn't knew the truth. The pain she faced, the nights she spent with tears streaming down her bruised cheeks.

[Janet Kimetto]

It does take courage to open up, and requires an enormous amount of trust, because if you're not careful about who you talk to, they could use what you told them against you and that would hurt you more. That being said, I believe that a problem shared is a problem halved. You just have to find the right people to help you.

[Nathaniel Owolabi]

Lena did her best for the Kaylayla and Maureen and like you mentioned she has had her own share of a hard an traumatic life to known when a person is going through so much. I also agree with the fact that you cannot stop a person from making mistakes. Although you can advice them. I am of the opinion that one should let people make their own mistakes if they are j tent on doing that. At least, they would learn from it.

[Linda S 1]

There is a social stigma around asking for help that makes people feel weak. But there are times when you need other people to give you love and support. Asking for help should be considered as the first sign of healing.

[19blueofficial]

Truth be told, what she said is the exact truth. No man is an island, even countries need other countries for help. Sometimes, people try to put up a strong front only to realize that they are breaking down inside.