God's Nightmare

[MsTri]

~ ACT I ~
“Y’all know the story, right?” Luz sauntered stage right, her jazzsim - an otherworldly color best described as a mix of burgundy and black, somewhat translucent and shimmery - bustier molding to her form, the matching micro-skirt holding her hips like dear friends. “I got filled up with pride, tried to take over Heaven, and got kicked out...Actually, I got full of Michael’s Pasta de Coiff - angel-hair pasta to you all - and that’s what that first trumpet actually was!”

Luz waited for the laughter to die down and gripping the microphone tighter, continued, “No, but really. Y’all don’t know how lucky you are you’re not in Heaven. You think thunderstorms down here are something; you don’t want to be around after God has had some Beans de Yahweh!”

Watching the crowd convulse in laughter, Luz tucked a lock of her derhig - a deeper black than anything seeable (or is that non-seeable?) on Earth - hair behind a french vanilla-like ear and smiled smugly to herself. These crazy fools thought she was putting on a show merely for their entertainment when in actuality, she was continuing on with the dumbing-down of humans, making them even more ripe for her picking.

The crowd’s titters subsiding, Luz kept on with her story. “And don’t even let me get started on Gabriel’s Lambchops!...”

At the mention of His prized angel’s favorite dish, God rolled over on His bed of unicorn mane, sinking further into the soft material and picking up the dream from a different angle.


~ ACT II ~
“So, there I was, in Heaven, beseeching God to see things my way.”

“Yes, yes, go on,” Dr. Jerome encouraged, glancing at his patient lying casually on the couch.

“But He just wouldn’t hear of it! I tried to tell Him that as the leader of His choir and therefore worship, I too deserved some recognition. Was it not I that got the angels pumped-up and ready to praise? Was it not I that worked diligently to make sure all harmonies were ready before each show? He just sits on His throne all infinity and has no idea of all the work it takes to make a good W&B...worship & blues, I mean...song!”

“And how did you feel about that?”

“I was SOOOOOOOOOO pissed! Furious! Livid! Uriel’s anger when someone messes with his poems is NOTHING compared to how upset I was!”

“And that’s when you fell?”

“No. It actually took a while longer... I thought since God wouldn’t see things my way, it might bolster my argument if I had some fellow ethereals speak on my behalf.”

“Other angels, you mean?”

“Right.” Luz took to twirling her dark ringlets around her six fingers. After a moment, she stood up and walked over to the psychiatrist’s mirror. Looking at her reflection, she remembered how it had been, and her iridescent eyes flashed. She could actually see the scene in the weird reflection, and she continued her story.

“But no matter how hard Garçon and Ambré and Isïana and the rest tried to make Him see things from our point of view, the harder He dug his heels in and refused.”

“So then?”

“So...THEN we jumped.”

God grunted and rolled over. Normally He could awaken Himself whenever He desired, but this eon, He was transfixed by His memories and couldn’t pull Himself out. The nightmare continued.


~ ACT III ~
Taking up her pen, Luz continued working on her autobiography. It was sure to be on the Bestseller’s List for at least a millennium.

‘So, there we were, all the angels I could muster and I, falling to another realm, the place He had called Earth.

When we finally landed, we were fascinated by the feeling of the material under our feet. Up to that point, we had flown everywhere and had never felt such a thing as the ground. After what was probably one human year, we came out of our haze and looked around. This world was a mess! It could never compare to the beauty that was our former home. The colors were pale mockeries of themselves, and the sounds were muted, as if heard through dirty ears. I bent down and touched what I now know is grass, and it stung my delicate fingers. Heaven had nothing so rough!

If THIS was their home, I couldn’t imagine how primitive and nauseating God’s newest creation must be. Still, Earth was my home now, and I had to make the most of it. I told my fellow rulers to fan out and make Earth ours, for God had Heaven, and we would NOT allow His plans for Earth to unfold.

After half a century or so, I came across a Garden. Looking between some bushes, I saw THEM. God’s creation. Humans. As I looked at their ugly forms, I felt a deep and unabiding hatred form within myself. No! I told myself. God shall not have them. They are mine, and they shall worship me!

Concentrating, I took on the form of a newly-created creature, something called a snake. Making my way over to the woman when the man left her for a moment, I put on a friendly face and spoke.

“Hello.”’

God yelled, “No!” Starting awake, He looked around. He was in the highest of Heavens, His sanctuary when Heaven got too busy. Blinking in its direction, He turned on His personal waterfall with merely a thought. “Michael!” He called for His favorite angel.

In an instant, the being appeared. “Yes, I Am.”

“I had a dream about Satan. What is she up to now?”

“She is actually on tour now, masquerading as a world-renowned pop star. If you like, I can open the curtain, so You may watch.”

“Yes.”

Michael opened the thin curtain between Heaven and Earth - thin, that is, to beings such as themselves - and God peered down at his former best student.


~ ACT IV ~
She pranced around on-stage, her dancers bumping and grinding behind her. Clad in a flesh-colored leotard, as was the fashion of the day, she introduced her next song.

“Thank you, thank you so much. Next is a song you all haven’t heard before, so consider this its World Premiere!”

The crowd went wild; new songs from Satin were always an event, and they couldn’t believe their fortune in being there for the newest and sure to be grandest. As Belzie started with a dope bass beat, the crowd started swaying, mesmerized.

“I am you and you are me,” she intoned, catching the frenetic wave. “You can’t escape my clutches, for I am thee.” She paused while the beat climbed higher still, the guitar and sax and drums adding to the intensity. “Wherever there is hatred, there we are...Wherever there is pride, there we are...My reach goes far, so far, so far...”

Not realizing that their beloved star was really Satan, the fallen star, the crowd danced along, never realizing the truth of her words.

[Lottie_Elsie]

This is just beautiful ma'am. Short and yet captivating! Well done.

[Bianka Walter]

I loved this!
I chuckled at Michael’s Pasta de Coiff - hilarious.

[Darrious132]

Very funny,i grew up on dr Seuss red fish blue fish and do you like green eggs and ham. Gave me a lot of childhood memories.

[Dragonsend]

I am so glad I stopped to read this. A satirical take on the subtle or not so subtle things we miss when it comes to letting Satan get in our lives! Bravo!

[Artizi]

This is fun and lovely, congrats! Keep on writing, you really have potential!

[Editor Forde]

I loved this piece because of how the humor bore truth of what the Bible records apart from satan being a woman!