Are The Parent To Blame?

TCG · Post by **TCG** » 15 Sep 2020, 17:46

You asked an important question. The fact is that parenting plays a role in the development of every child; however, cultural and environmental influences play a crucial role too.

Aishwarya Chhabra · Post by **Aishwarya Chhabra** » 15 Sep 2020, 20:55

I do not think parents are to blame in this novel. They themselves are bound to invisible shackles of their needs, but they still raised their children well. We all eventually grow up to become what we really are. A flower grows from mud. Nothing can prevent it.

Laura Mich · Post by **Laura Mich** » 16 Sep 2020, 06:54

Parenting is definitely not a walk in the park. Joey for one is wrong. Boys are as sensitive and as human as girls are and should brought up with affection equally.

Scerakor · Post by **Scerakor** » 16 Sep 2020, 08:10

That question of nurture vs. nature has been plaguing the field of child development as long as it has existed. I don't believe you can concisely squirrel it away into a clear black or white discussion. Does parental treatment play a role in how they eventualy become citizens? Yes, absolutely. Are there cases where regardless of "impeccable parenting" (entirely subjective) that bad apples still result. Absolutely.

bush reads · Post by **bush reads** » 16 Sep 2020, 10:05

I think the way a child is brought up, really does shape most aspects of their personality. Nonetheless, there is no "right" way to raise children. All one can do is try and succeed at whatever they think is best and whatever they can afford to do. Also, people constantly keep changing and evolving. Once, your child steps out of the house, meets other people who influence their life, their personality changes. They learn and they grow. So, you cannot completely hold somebody guilty for the what kind of life choices their child makes. This is what I feel...

RachelEmmanuel · Post by **RachelEmmanuel** » 16 Sep 2020, 11:10

It's the old nature vs nurture debate. I think to some extent, often a large extent, parenting does play a role in the choices of the children. It's especially true with fathers and sons. I don't think Joey's parenting style was the best but in the end I think the parents did the best they knew how.

ciecheesemeister · Post by **ciecheesemeister** » 16 Sep 2020, 12:47

Maureen is doing the best that she can with the hand she's been dealt. I think that Maureen's mother is an awful and selfish person and her father's character was too weak to maintain a good relationship with his daughter, but at least he ends up trying to help in his way.
Lena was severely abused by her husband and was suffering from PTSD. I think that she did the best she could.
Jamal and Clarence's parents should have done something about Clarence's behavior, including taking him for counseling. I did not find the narrative that one incident turned Clarence into a "bad person" and potential rapist entirely believable.

Thea Frederick · Post by **Thea Frederick** » 16 Sep 2020, 20:02

I think oftentimes issues with children are founded in their parents. The child was not given proper instruction etc. But there are other times that, despite our best efforts, children will do their own thing.

rondanoh1 · Post by **rondanoh1** » 17 Sep 2020, 10:14

Each child has their own personality and pre-disposistion. As parents we should do all we can to train them in the way that will make them decent and moral adults. This isn't always easy and it doesn't always work. I've worked with troubled youth and some had "bad" or no parenting and were fairly decent kids because of the influence of good teachers and other authorities. Others had what we would consider "good" parents and they were headed down a distructive and immoral road because of the influence of peers. It is not all what parents do. We can only do our best and trust what we did is enough.

austenfan · Post by **austenfan** » 17 Sep 2020, 10:29

I always hold the parents accountable because children need attention and help. Parents often are lost in their own troubles to see and understand the problems of their kids. Life is difficult and every human being knows this simple fact so if you're going to have kids quite complaining and be a good role model!

elisathelvarik · Post by **elisathelvarik** » 17 Sep 2020, 14:23

Parenting is a major part of a child's life. For example, certain parents have a parenting style: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved. Parents are what children need to have a secure base to start learning and growing on their own. Some parents don't have a choice, but to leave their children alone for prolonged periods of the day. This will affect how the child sees their parents, his or herself, the attitude towards the world, etc. Parents are where they start, but it also depends on the child's resilience. A child can have a rough upbringing and end up fine in the future, but that requires a good base and support. No one has the "correct way" to parent, but there are factors that affect the child that one needs to understand to utilize the time with their child.

Abacus · Post by **Abacus** » 17 Sep 2020, 16:41

Discuss "Kalayla" by Jeannie Nicholas -Are the parents to blame? The author showed us the pain of Kalayla, Lena and Maureen, and I'm inclined to think that the parents are to blame. Parenting is so difficult, especially when parents themselves still have maturity developing.

Ldpuff · Post by **Ldpuff** » 17 Sep 2020, 21:15

This topic is very real life to me. I am a behavioral interventions teacher and I have seen all different types of parents. Sometimes I do believe the actions of the children are the parents’ fault. Other times, I see great parents with kids who act insane. It is so hard to judge whether it truly is always a causation relationship.

Amara911 · Post by **Amara911** » 18 Sep 2020, 01:12

I might not be in the best positions to judge this maybe because I am yet to be a parent. Personally, I think parenting, peer pressure, and the individual involved all have to be blamed for moral uprightness. The parent should be guidance and not a watcher.